After 12 years, the Mommy Store continues!

I started a Mommy Store when I only had 3 kids and now it's still going strong with 8.  You can type in Mommy Store in the search bar of my blog and you'll see past posts about it. 

It was started as a motivation to behave.  We didn't know at the time that my oldest, Pookie, has Aspergers (High-Functioning Autism).  We were on the lookout for a disclipine system that he would respond to.

They get rewarded for good behavior with tokens or tickets or money that they can then use to buy treats and whatnot at The Mommy Store.  We currently use money. 

For about a year, The Mommy Store reward system had been converted into a tool to teach money to the little kids.  We weren't consistently using it anymore as a way of discipline, but we weren't ready for it to go away.  Everyone still enjoyed it. 

Every couple of months or so, all the children would get a dollar in play money. They got to shop from The Mommy Store for the sole purpose of figuring out what's a good deal, how many things they can buy, that money isn't limitless, etc.

These regular attempts at teaching money management seemed to help as I see some of them carefully save every penny.  Of course, I also still see some eager to spend every single coin they have as if it's burning a hole in their pocket.

I realized that my kids could still learn about money without me just handing money over to them.  So we went back to our original reason for having the store.  

 For a while I did away with it when my kids were not willing to do things to help unless something was in it for them.  If this kind of behavior increases, I don't let them visit the store for a while.  It's a delicate balance between handing over rewards for good behavior and letting them understand the heavenly rewards for obedience and service.  
 
We are back to using it again to encourage good behavior.  Sometimes, no one wants to help with particularly heinous jobs, and I say, "Whoever helps with X will be rewarded with Mommy Money."  That usually does the trick and I get volunteers.

 Our card table was our wrapping station at Christmas time except when I set up the store on it.

Some friends have asked me, "Why does a teenager have interest in The Mommy Store?"  

I asked Gabbers, 15 1/2, a few questions.

Me:  How do you earn money for The Mommy Store?

G:  When we do an extra chore or do something really nicely without complaint, we get Mommy Store money.   

Me:  Why would a teenager want to shop at The Mommy Store?

G:  It's cool to see what options there are.  It's always fun to see if there's new stuff and neat when you see things that you didn't know was there.  I like it because it's an easy way to earn money and you don't have to wait for an allowance and wait to go to The Dollar Tree or something.  

Me:  How often do we have The Mommy Store?

G:  It's always on a Friday but not every week.  It's about every 2-3 weeks.  

Me:  Do you like going to The Mommy Store?  

G:  Yeah, why wouldn't I??  There are treats, stickers, pencils, fun stuff!

whistles I bought for the store

The rules:  Go above and beyond helping out and you get Mommy Money.  The store is sometimes every Friday, but more often it's every other Friday.  I keep track on my phone how much Mommy Money they have.  They can ask me at any time how much their balance it.  

They use that money to shop when I open the store.  Sometimes they choose not to use it all.  A couple kids like to keep a positive balance in their account-- even if it's 5 cents.    

They can never lose what's in their mommy store money account.  We do not discipline bad behavior that way.  However, sometimes we wait to have the Mommy Store until morale improves.  

They may spend their own money (in addition to what they've earned specifically for the store) but they must get back in line to spend it.  This allows everyone a chance to shop before one person buys out everything.  

  This pic was from last Christmastime.  They were eager to buy tiny ornaments and Christmas lights to decorate their rooms.

I don't see The Mommy Store going away anytime soon. We all like it too much. 

 Sometimes it's hard to decide when there are sooooo many goodies.

 Our most recent line at The Mommy Store just a few days ago.

In which I realize my brilliance.

The playroom was a grand mess.  I know, this shocks you.  And nobody wanted to clean it up-- not even with the threat of me donating everything. 

 

 

Well, they did start cleaning it up-- begrudgingly and slow.

 

 

Pookie was folding his 35th piece of laundry when I called him out of the laundry room and said, "I want you to go pick up 10 things in the playroom and put them away."

 

 

He didn't whine but he slumped off not amused.

 

 

Then I called him back and said, "Actually we'll have some fun and do a little code with pick-up."

 

 

"Go and pick up 6 things and come back.  When you come back, you're going to write the number 6 on a paper with a line underneath it for the code."

 

 

The next number was 18.

 

 

Basically "F" is the 6th letter of the alphabet. 

 

 

Pookie was having a really good time knowing he'd be decoding when he was done.

 

 

When he was done with all the numbers I told him, "1 = A and 26 = Z."

 

 

Then he started decoding.  As he was decoding I told him, "When you're done you'll see what prize you get."

 

 

In all (if I calculated right), he will have picked up 140 things (be it trash, toys, shoes, clothes, puzzle pieces, whatever).

 

 

And his prize?  F R U I T  S N A C K S

 

 

I sell them occasionally in the Mommy Store and they're always asking for them.  But I am stingy with the fruit snacks.  They're not good for your teeth you know.  These happen to be Angry Birds fruit snacks (not any better for your teeth but awesome looking).

 

 

If you'd like to read about our Mommy Store, you can click on the label "Mommy-Store" on my right sidebar and read the posts that pertain to it.

I'm not gaining many popularity points.

I think I may have secured the title of Meanest Mom of the Year. 

We just started a new points system with the kids.  It's very much like the Mommy Store but they can redeem points daily.  Their only limitation is they can only pick one goody/treat per day.  No saving up 50 points and buying five candy canes to snork down at once.

For example:

Today the goodies available to buy are Cherry Cordial Cookies and candy canes.  Most of the kids picked a candy cane.  But since I had two green apple Tootsie pops left, I offered the twins that option.  They happily chose "pop-pops."

picture here

Of course they would NOT stay in their chairs at the table.  High chairs aren't even an option anymore-- they can escape in less than 30 seconds from them.

I should also add, it's FREEZING outside.  So sitting on the porch licking a lollipop is not an option either.

I reminded them about twelve times to sit at the table with their lollipops.

Then I told them, "If you don't stay at the table I will have to take away your lollipop." 

In about 90 seconds there was lollipop stickiness on my curtains, digital grand piano, lightswitches, doorknobs and the bottom of the television (which was off so I don't know why it lured them). 

I had to keep my word.  We don't issue threats unless we're willing to follow through.

I took the lollipops.  I knew full well that if I threw them in the kitchen trash they'd dig them right back out.  So I marched outside to the curb, where the big black garbage can is waiting for the garbage man, with twins trailing closely behind, and tossed them in. 

Squdge threw himself down in the middle of the road a helpless Pop-Pop-less heap.

The crying didn't cease for about 10 minutes.  The pouting much longer.  Gabbers just watched in disbelief.  The only reason they did stop crying was because I put Word World on so I could stuff workboxes and teach a long division lesson.

Valentine's Day for the Tightwad

Start your celebration at sun-up so by sun-down your kids will have sweet memories to go to sleep with and you and your hubby can watch a dollar show from the red box thing while your Tater and Squdge roll around the living room floor leaving drool puddles.

The going rate in my neck of the woods is $2.50 a kid per hour for a babysitter.  probably more on Valentine's weekend.  I'm not forking over $15.00 an hour! 

It's not legal to leave your kids with the 8 year old.  or smart.

My kids think this day is about them and they want to celebrate it too.  The Ultimate Family Guide to an ALL OUT Valentine's Day Celebration is an article that I wrote a few years ago.  We pretty much follow the same game plan but with minor changes. 

I tried to make these adorable Valentines found at HowDoesShe.com (which is also where the photo is from) and found the kids had a difficult time getting the candy through the maze. 

Today we made these.  Picture and tutorial is from No Time for Flash Cards.

I used red glitter, pink glitter, and heliotrope glitter foam for the hearts.  I didn't end up doing ribbons though.  I think I might add the ribbons for wands I'm saving for my kids.  I'd take my own picture but Danny has the camera. 

So this is what I'm doing slightly different this year:

Prepare pancake batter (using the stuff bought on sale) and pour into an old syrup bottle to make easy heart-shaped pancakes.

Pink milk will be with food coloring instead of strawberry syrup.

In addition to the hearts hanging from the ceiling, I also have Valentine's balloons in pink, white, and red with hearts that I bought for one dollar at Wal-Mart.

The kid activities:

Instead of finger painting with pudding this year, we'll be playing with pink playdough, rolling pins, and cookie cutters.

heart day bingo

The treasure hunt prizes are the pink playdough we'll play with and red Pez refills from after-Christmas sales.  We keep our Pez dispensers in a Mommy treasure bucket (formerly the Mommy-Store) and the kids "rent" them out.

The romantic date basket for Danny and me for after 2/3 of the kids are asleep:

• cheeseball and crackers (make this cheeseball recipe)
• bubbly (Strawberry Fanta- it's red [for Valentine's Day] and it's bubbly but not overly bubbly thus taking away from the taste and atmosphere like Sparkling Apple Cider and FAR more responsible than alcohol [which goes without saying but I had to say it anyway])
• fluted glasses to pour the fancy bubbly drink into (that I received from my bridal shower 11 1/2 years ago)
• a couple of homemade cloth napkins to line the bottom, add to the look, and be a little green ;)

This post is linked at LifeAsMom.com.

Guess what 3 white chips can buy.

I tried to buy myself 10 more minutes of sleep this morning by offering Pookie, who was sleeping on Danny's side of the bed, 3 white chips. After I finally convinced him that he would be doing Mommy a huge favor by not getting up yet, he fell back asleep and I got another HOUR!!! How did I do this? I also asked G ever-so-sweetly in a tone that suggested it was what she really wanted, "Would you like to turn on your light and play with Bun quietly while I nurse Ham?" She said, "Wahoo!" Fortunately, Bun didn't wake up yet so I knew they were not into mischief. And I had Ham latched-on and fell back asleep.

Peanut Butter Thoughts

I've been thinking a lot about peanut butter lately. Could you tell from my poll? Anyways, tonight as I was thinking about eating a spoonful of CRUNCHY peanut butter I remembered this post that my hubby wrote back when we thought I was Celiac. Fun memories. Usually the only time I think of peanut butter so frequently is when I'm in my third trimester of pregnancy. Maybe it's an exercise-induced craving. I'm thinking Muddy Buddies sound good right now (with Creamy peanut butter though). Yah! Now I've talked myself into making Muddy Buddies for the Mommy-Store.

Oh, and a very Happy Birthday to the one and only Emily-Bemily Boo (my niece)! She's now officially two! Emily is the third one from the left.

WFMW-- the Mommy Store/a disciplining lifesaver!

Today's WFMW is our life-saving discovery and discipline help-- the Mommy-Store! I was going to add a photo of the Mommy-Store, but my digital camera is on the fritz. So, I'll add it as soon as possible. I've written about the Mommy-Store before in this post. And the how-to's on Mommy-Money in this post. The only things that have changed are available goods, it's now open on Wednesdays, and Bun wants in on this very, very good thing! If you have further questions, please feel free to comment or email me. Thanks for reading!

note: I thought this would eventually get old with the kids. But it doesn't. I just need to post little notes around the house reminding me of the Mommy-Store. When I think about it, I notice the good more in the children rather than the irritating things. I look for opportunities to award white chips.

ADDED NOTE: In response to a few more questions . . .

Poker chips are what we use for Mommy-Money. We bought them in the game section at Wal-Mart. Having never gambled or played poker before, I didn't know where to find them or what they would look like. So I asked an associate. They're very inexpensive.

Right now, we've simplified prices according to shelf. The top shelf items cost 1 Mommy-Money (Mr. Potato Head noses, ears, and eyes, stickers, or one Hershey Kiss), the middle shelf items cost 3 Mommy-Money (Pez refills, seasonal pencils, coupons, a stick of gum), the bottom shelf items cost 5 Mommy-Money (books, doctor kit items).

There is a glass canning jar for each child with their name on it. Then there's a bigger glass jar with all the Mommy-Money in it. When they get awarded, I hand them their jar and their chip so they can put it in.

Thoughtful Gabby

On the way home from G’s last day of speech therapy yesterday I decided I was feeling too lazy to make anything for lunch and declared it drive-thru day at Burger King. I called Danny to ask if he wanted us to bring lunch to him at work (which he most hungrily agreed to). I told him that if Taco Bell had a drive-thru I’d frequent them more often, but I didn’t see the sense in unbuckling all three kids, dragging them into the BX food mall to get tacos and then back into the van and to him in freezing weather. Pookie overheard “Taco Bell” and said, “I want a taco! I don’t want a cheeseburger and fry-fries!” I told him, “No,” and that we were going to Burger King. Then G says, “Pookie, I will buy you a taco at da Mommy Store.” Then Pookie quipped back with, “You’re silly G. The Mommy Store doesn’t sell tacos!”

Mommy-money

I cannot take credit for this system. A dear friend of mine with six angelic children told me about it. I’ve also read variations of the chip system online.

White Chips= 1 Mommy-Money
Blue Chips= 10 Mommy-Money
Red Chips= -1 Mommy-Money or 1 debt

White Chips are awarded for good behavior. Blue chips are really, really excellent, over the top, amazingly good behavior—or if you just need to turn in some white chips (like a dime for 10 pennies).

Red Chips are like red lights. The behavior is unacceptable and needs to stop immediately. Red chips are for hitting, throwing toys, absolute defiance, screaming tantrums, etc. A quiet, "Do you want a red chip?" stops a tantrum most of the time. If they have already thrown a toy or hit we say, "Oh, this is so sad. Here is your red chip. Please go to time out." So, sometimes we combine time out with a red chip.

The Mommy Store is open only Tuesday mornings after play clothes are on, breakfast is over and cleaned up, and all toys are picked up. First they go to the Mommy-Bank and pay debts. They pay one white chip for every one red chip they have. If they have any money leftover they may shop at The Mommy Store. Customers are served on an alternating basis until they are done shopping or all their money is gone (the latter is usually the case).

Store products
Pookie and G love playing with Mr. Potato Heads at friends’ homes and Grandma’s house. So I bought two; one was basic, the other had a deluxe kit with all the extra accessories. Then I separated all the parts and itemized them on a list with prices next to them. I got a set of little books from Wal-Mart (like $6 for a dozen) and an inexpensive doctor kit they admired every time we went down the toy aisle. And to add variety there are little candies and valuable coupons available as well.

Mommy Store- Now Open!

I have anticipated this moment all week- and so have the kids. Tuesday is the day when Mommy’s Store is open. It is open only once a week in our home and the kids now associate Tuesdays with shopping at the store. Last week G had 9 Mommy-Money and Pookie had 18 Mommy-Money. They took turns shopping. Pookie bought a Mr. Potato Head first and then G. Pookie bought eyes, and then G bought eyes. And that was the end of G’s money. Pookie bought arms, a nose, and a mustache for his Mr. Potato Head. G looked on longingly. Pookie said, “G, I will buy your potato arms.” G said, “Okay.” I realized then that my children are learning charity.

So this morning I was excited to see who had the most Mommy-Money and what would they do with it. The store was recently blessed with a large amount of Pez refills and Christmas Hershey Kisses. There was also an influx of valuable coupons for sale:

· stay up 30 minutes past your bedtime
· one extra story before bed
· 15 minutes of the racing game
· one extra helping of dessert
· 15 extra minutes of computer time
· a trip to the park of your choice.

Pookie went first. He bought the blood pressure cuff from the play doctor kit. G bought a tongue for Mrs. Potato Head. Pookie bought the stethoscope next. G bought a red visor for her potato. Pookie then bought the thermometer. G then bought a pink nose. Pookie then bought the much coveted syringe and promptly went about administering shots. G then bought ears. Pookie went to buy the otoscope but didn’t have enough Mommy-Money left. G the bought the Mrs. glasses, shoes and earrings. G then bought Pookie’s potato glasses, a hat, ears, and shoes. And Pookie said, “Oh, thank you G!”

With just one Mommy-Money left in Pookie’s jar and two left in G’s, they bought Christmas Hershey kisses that were on sale today only.