Gray hairs, distractions, and poop

Dear Journal,

Monday I found two gray hairs two inches from my left temple. Gone are the days of one gray hair a year. I guess that's what having four kids does to a person.

Yesterday I was sewing hooded towels for the kids for Christmas in their colors. I had Ham in a backpack on my back pulling my hair enthusiastically. Bun was studiously going through the 72-hour kits looking for goodies. After encouraging Bun away from the 72-hour kits, he thought it would be most fun to crawl under my feet. I thought, "Well, one day when I'm old and sewing all by myself I may feel sad that I don't have little helpers around to slow my sewing progress down. Maybe."

This afternoon I went into the ducky bathroom to give Bun-Bun a bath and discovered it had "that smell." I've heard of "that smell" before and fully expected it would happen one day having three boys and all. Today was the day. I honestly don't understand how it happens. (I teach the boys to do their business sitting down.) So, while Bun-Bun bathed read: splashed and played with toys I scrubbed the sink, the wall, the cabinet, the toilet, and the floor until they really REALLY sparkled. And then G came in and used the toilet and asked me to wipe her butt. I do realize the use of "butt" probably lowers the rating of my blog but it had to be used--because "butt" brings to mind a less than "sparkly" image, and I want you to know why it's not sparkly anymore (should you come over to my home and wonder). So there went my sparkly bathroom. I thought to myself One day all my kids will be accomplished enough to wipe their own rear-ends. And then I went into my master bathroom to put away the cleanser and Pine-Sol to find Pookie using it and he said, "Mommy, look at my poop." I replied, "Um... no. I don't think I need to. I believe you went." And then Pookie wiped with five squares of toilet paper misunderstanding the reason to use more than one square. He held firmly by the middle square and used that. So, remaining perfectly composed I said, "Pookie, when you have a poop and feel the need to use more than one square (I'm thinking as you very well should) you should wad up the toilet paper like this so you don't get any poop on you. Here try again." But under my completely calm confident appearance I was thinking "Oh. my. gross. Has he been wiping like that for two and a half years?! Remain calm. Encourage good hand-washing. Make this a teaching experience." hurl. One day Pookie won't feel the need to tell me about his bathroom achievements. And how sad will that be? Such is life in Pookieville.