I have been stuck in limbo since Thursday. I haven't seen Biscuit since Thursday morning around 7 a.m. when I began to feel a little tired and my head felt warm/dizzy. So I requested the transporter to take me back to the Mother Baby ward to my room. While waiting I decided it was best to move to the reclining chair in the corner of Biscuit's NICU room so I didn't fall out of the chair I was sitting on next to her bassinet.
A nurse gave me a cool wet washcloth to hold on my forehead and a cup of ice water. I said, "I don't know why I feel so strange. I think maybe lack of sleep. I'll come back later to visit her before I get discharged."
I went back to my room and slept until the room service people came in to remind me to order lunch. After lunch I decided to take a shower before being discharged. I remember my whole body being SO COLD and I kept turning up the warm water.
Shortly before 3 p.m. I was antipating staying in the hospital's closeby donation apartments to be near Biscuit. I had been informed I was approved and needed someone to help take my stuff over there. But I wasn't feeling very well and didn't want to be there alone feeling this way.
Then I spiked a fever of 102.9 and they brought in lab. All my blood tests were coming back normal. My lungs started burning and the nurse described me as looking "gray." They rushed me to Radiology for a chest x-ray thinking I had a Pulmonary Embolism. I had the chills forever. I thought my body would never stop shaking. X-ray came back clear-- but we didn't know that for at least a day.
I kept asking the nurses. They pretty much gave me the same answer, "If the x-ray indicated Pulmonary Embolism, you'd be in the ICU under constant supervision." I was fairly satisfied with that answer.
I knew when I started sweating that my fever was breaking. But then I'd start the chills again as my fever would rise. The doctor had me on 3 broad-spectrum antibiotics via IV. His best guess was that I have a really bad UTI (from the catheter from the c-section) because the ONLY test that came back abnormal was my urine--- which had white blood cells in it. But he said,
"It may be an infection in your uterus. Wherever it is, these antibiotics will kill it. Eat your yogurt."
The doctor told me that when it has been 48 hours without a fever (100.4), then I can go home.
So when I say I'm in limbo, it's because I can't go see my kids at home (who I miss dearly) and even though I'm here near Biscuit in the hospital, I can't see her until I haven't had a fever at least 24 hours. But I am SO excited because I'll finally be able to hold her and kiss her. I've only held her hand and been able to put my hand on her knee.
It has been a crazy journey. How calm my life will seem after this is all done with!